11 Subtle Traits of People Who Are Difficult to Understand

Everyone has preferences, strengths, and expectations for their friends and partners, and it’s just human nature that not everyone “clicks” and makes a great connection. But some people struggle to maintain any healthy relationshipand often this is because they embody the subtle characteristics of people who are fundamentally difficult to get along with.

Accordingly A study from the Journal of Personality AssessmentMany of these negative personality traits are inherently intertwined with insecurity caused by the unfulfilled desire for social stability and emotional security. Although their external characteristics are noticeable and often frustrating to others, they are tied to internal conflicts, making them inherently difficult to accept, address, and heal.

Here are 11 subtle characteristics of people who are difficult to get along with:

1. They have transactional relationships

The couple argues and looks angry. garets workshop | shutterstock.com

Although experts have primarily studied and researched transactional relationships, their presence in our lives, especially in our developed relationships, can be difficult and complicated to accept. They manifest in disturbingly subtle ways, from metaphorical conversational comments to literal Venmo requests from friends.

Such connections, as they often are, can be both emotionally and physically draining. Develop the same stress and anxiety as a work interaction rather than a friendship or partnership.

2. They are jealous

Jealous woman looking sadly at her phone. Suthida Phensri | shutterstock.com

Jealousy is a complex and deep-rooted experience that arises not only with insecurity and complex inner emotions, but also randomly in daily life. While fleeting interactions or frustrating conflicts with people in our lives may feel personal, they are actually a reflection of one’s comfort in one’s own identity. A study from the Journal of Psychoanalytic Psychotherapy It explains very well.

The subtleties of jealous people in daily life may look different in relationships. However, these people will often belittle you in front of others, deliberately give you bad advice, or even accuses you of being “unfair” just for being you and sharing your accomplishments, feelings and experiences.

3. It’s all about them

The woman looked angry and sad on the couch. Bagus Production | shutterstock.com

Attention-seeking behaviors are some of the most subtle characteristics of difficult people to get along with; because they are rooted in personal discomfort, trauma, and insecurities that many people spend their entire lives grappling with. Both can be difficult to handle from an outside perspective and difficult to learn personally.

Many people find such narcissistic tendencies confusing. It is aimed to improve themselves, also known as protection against the negative opinions of others. A study from the European Review of Social Psychology explains. Ironically, their efforts to protect themselves in the public eye only harm their perception of others and make it harder to maintain healthy connections.

4. They get angry easily during arguments

The couple is arguing at home. SrdjanVrebac | shutterstock.com

Other subtle characteristics of elusive people revolve around a confusing sense of self-identity. Many insecure people spend much of their time “wearing a mask,” constantly defending themselves against judgment and outside opinions, but unknowingly harming their own emotional intelligence.

Psychologist Nick Wignall argues People with healthy emotional intelligence will validate other people’s feelings without judgment. Yet people who are difficult to like and connect with are often quick to resort to criticism. They fear vulnerability because they are falsely imbued with a sense of inferiority, and they resort to frustration when called upon to suppress or invalidate emotions.

5. They expect emotional support but never give it

The woman looked angry at her desk. Julia Zavalishina | shutterstock.com

Like Life coach Christy Whitman explains“emotional vampires” always focus on their own emotional needs and desires rather than those of others. Even when you are looking for support or desperately need a listening ear, they will find ways to talk about themselves.

These are the kind of people who are constantly struggling harder, working harder, and experiencing more trauma than everyone around them, and they will find ways to let you know that. They deserve emotional validation and support like everyone else. But they need constant attention their trust in commercial relations Feeling a sense of control over their connections.

6. They seem to know everything about everything

The woman looks annoyed while her partner talks. Fizkes | shutterstock.com

Although it is a largely under-researched and misinterpreted psychological phenomenon, attention-seeking behaviors occur frequently in daily life. A study by the British Psychological Society argues. One of these subtle characteristics of difficult to understand people is the tendency to misrepresent their knowledge and skills in order to impress others.

Often a way to maintain control over conversations and connections, such people assert their dominance by acting like they know it all and claiming that they are “naturally better” than others in their lives. This type of behavior is equally annoying and annoying constantly widening the gap of reality among many relationships.

7. They are always working or talking about work

Man looks tired and looks at his laptop. Inside the Creative House | shutterstock.com

As Elliot D. Cohen, founder of the International Journal of Applied Philosophy, states: Psychology Today blog seriesPeople who complain a lot about work often ruminate on negative thoughts and view their complaints as a way to emotionally validate their struggles.

They want to appear more important and engaged to maintain authority in their relationships, and for many this means painting a possibly fabricated picture of their professional life.

if not cycle of obsessive thoughtsThey may complain as a way to connect socially, but for people who are difficult to get along with, this is often more toxic than helpful to connections.

8. They’re always touching you or your space

The woman looks uncomfortable when a man is talking to her. WBMUL | shutterstock.com

Many people feel unheard, unsupported, and disrespected by entitled people, especially when they feel they have control over their physical space and emotional energy.

Overstepping communicated boundaries and reasonable social expectations to connect, these people will not only invade your emotional health with negative thoughts and unhealthy conversations, but also your personal space with physical affection or toxic body language.

A. Study from the Journal of Psychoanalytic Psychology He explains that this type of empowerment can be a defense mechanism for many people, protecting them from the necessary vulnerability and complex emotions in social situations. Instead of relieving their discomfort, they force others to endure it, making it difficult for them to enjoy their company.

9. They complain all the time

Man complaining to his partner at home. Dean Drobot | shutterstock.com

Interacting with someone who gossips or complains to connect with others can be emotionally draining, making it difficult to connect and develop a healthy relationship.

Although often a sign of insecurity or mental turmoilWhile this deserves to be supported and recognized, there is a certain threshold that friends, partners, parents and others must accept when it comes to protecting their own well-being.

10. They are suspicious of random things

A woman looking jealous and sad. YEAST LABORATORY | shutterstock.com

Your true friends and supportive people in your life will be graciously received when you share your victories with them. As counselor Brittney Lindstrom points out, sharing your triumphs with them is a hallmark of a healthy relationship. His article about useful links.

However, others who are determined to sabotage you or are simply struggling internally will do their best to criticize you. From the importance of your success to something as small as your appearance, putting you down is their self-improvement, an ironic twist on their efforts to gain external approval and social approval.

11. They never take responsibility

Woman looks uncomfortable while her boyfriend is talking. Dragana Gordic | shutterstock.com

A. 2019 research study on responsibility He argues that there is a social misconception that making mistakes is a sign of weakness, and that this can be extremely effective for people with selfish or narcissistic tendencies. In relationships and connections with these people, they are expected to resort to shifting blame to distance themselves from perceived negative situations.

Although it helps them release personal emotional burdens like shame and guilt, their friends and partners often feel more unheard, especially when their mistakes or conflicts revolve around the well-being of their relationship.

Zayda Slabbekoorn is a News and entertainment Writer at YourTango, focusing on health and wellness, social policy and human interest stories.