Miss Manners: Can we ask the waiter to stop refilling our wine glasses?

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My wife and I don’t eat out often, but when we do we like to go to a nice restaurant and usually drink a bottle of wine.

One thing that bothered us was that the server stopped frequently to refill our glasses (mostly when the glasses were almost full). Not only does this interrupt our conversation, it feels like they’re trying to get us to finish the bottle quicker.

What’s the best way to let them know that we prefer to pour our own wine?

kind reader: Place your hand over your glass and politely say: “Thank you. “I haven’t finished this glass yet and we don’t want to disturb you, so we can fill the rest ourselves.”

Miss Manners will join you in scolding the waitress for just doing her job, hoping she doesn’t react badly by, for example, continuing to pour it into your hand.