10 Signs That Your Adult Child Is a Narcissist, According to Psychology

While narcissists are often overlooked, little known research A child’s parents may disagree about their daily life and behavior. Not only are narcissists more likely to exhibit self-serving behaviors such as manipulation and belittling language, they are also willing to compromise close relationships to boost their ego or assert their superiority.

While these parental relationships are extremely important, Neuroscience research shows that: By their very nature, they bind us with an innate sense of trust; Having a narcissistic child can burden you with guilt, make you feel worthless, and make you feel unappreciated as a parent. According to psychology, recognizing the signs that your adult child is narcissistic can help you set better boundaries.

Here are 10 signs that your adult child is a narcissist, according to psychology:

1. They act impulsively

Frustrated narcissistic woman looking angry at home. Carolina Kaboompics | CanvaPro

If you’ve noticed that your adult child is quick to make big decisions, from entering a new relationship to making a major purchase or booking a plane ticket with hours to spare, he or she may have narcissistic tendencies. Narcissists who are more concerned with the outcome of a major life change or decision (the attention of others) will ignore the important beginning of making them.

A. Journal published in the National Library of Medicine He argues that the narcissist’s overconfident personality and strong ego often push them to make these bad decisions. With a mixture of impulsivity, rejection of expert advice, and misguided superiority, they are more likely to misjudge a situation and make a decision that harms themselves or others.

Not taking responsibility for these decisions may also be a sign that your adult child is narcissistic, according to psychology research. Shifting blame and using false self-confidence to protect their image.

2. They are extroverted and social

Fizkes | shutterstock.com

Narcissists, who have an innate need for the attention and approval of others, often have a large and ever-evolving social circle of friends, co-workers, and acquaintances.

According to a Published in the journal Psychological Research in 2001These energetic, sociable, and extroverted tendencies are typical of a person with a narcissistic personality; They thrive on being valued or admired by others.

As a parent, you may notice your child’s need for external validation early in his life as he becomes more expressive when speaking, has a disruptive assertiveness, and high energy level.

In adulthood, this can manifest in many ways, but most commonly as overconfidence, which inherently tends to attract others, especially people. those with deep insecurities things that coincide with the inner turmoil of a narcissist. For this reason narcissistic workers often get a higher salary and promotions at work – they’re willing to do anything to please their bosses and present themselves as the most competent and confident they can be.

3. They lack true empathy

Serious narcissistic adult woman in public. Boulevard | shutterstock.com

Although he has better emotional recognition than the average person, Front Psychiatry journalLike being able to understand another’s sadness or vulnerability, most narcissists are not truly empathetic. While they may appear to support other people’s feelings, as research suggests, this is often based on a self-serving activity such as manipulation.

So, although they can recognize and accept other people’s emotions, they are not willing to support them unless it helps them support an internal superiority complex or gain an advantage.

A. fundamental aspect of our connection with othersAs a parent, it can be difficult to accept your adult child’s lack of empathy. If boundaries are damaged, you will only continue to feel the guilt and shame that comes with every interaction, but with the right advocacy you can move forward and build a healthier relationship.

4. They feel entitled to your time and energy

Mother comforting narcissistic adult child at home. JJ-stock studio | shutterstock.com

Particularly for parents of narcissistic adult children, many people in their lives feel burdened by their need for constant attention, help, support, and kindness. Narcissists inherently feel entitled to everyone’s time, space, and energy, especially the people they have had relationships with throughout their lives.

Without healthy boundaries for their relationships, these parents will do anything to help their children but are often abused and shamed. Narcissistic children may even use their diagnosis to blame their parents, arguing that it is their fault that they need help or the situation they are in.

But this way A research article from PNAS He argues that the roots of narcissism in children are multifaceted and complex in nature. Although a parent’s behavior has the power to greatly impact the lives of their children, it is not solely responsible for the existence of narcissistic traits.

5. They are pessimistic

Grumpy woman looking sad while sitting on sofa. Faalguni Mandal | CanvaPro

With A fragile ego and deep-seated insecuritiesNarcissists who do not receive enough attention or validation from others often struggle with intense mood swings and frustration.

Of course, even if they do receive this attention from others, the majority of their relationships are superficial in nature—driven by their own needs and manipulative tactics—perpetuating a cycle of isolation that leads to pessimism, depression, and anxiety in their lives.

6. They use your triggers and insecurities against you

Adult parent looking sad and angry on couch. Andriy Zastrozhnov | shutterstock.com

Given that their ability to read people extends to all situations, many narcissists can use people’s vulnerabilities against them in arguments or conflicts. If your adult child knows that you have a hard time yelling, he will get louder and louder until he gets what he wants.

If they’re aware of your insecurities about your body, your relationships, or even your job, they’ll be the first to attack those things when you set boundaries, say “no,” or try to call them out on their behavior.

7. They often use profanity or inappropriate language

Narcissistic man shouting during argument. Joaquin Corbalan P | shutterstock.com

It turns out that narcissists use more swearing, inappropriate language, and profanity than the average person. Studies from the Journal of Language and Social Psychologynot only because they are more confident and self-assured that they can do anything they want, but also because they seek attention.

According to the psychology of self-serving behavior, this tendency to swear, whether it’s because they don’t care or just want attention, is one of the key signs that your adult child is a narcissist. It may also be characterized by a narcissist being untrustworthy, even in close relationships, such as with friends or parents.

Even if they lie, they may swear at a family member during an argument because I don’t mind justifying their deliberate deception. They are willing to manipulate others into thinking they are being honest.

8. They love to ‘bomb’ you

Mother and narcissistic adult child hugging and smiling. Nuva Frames | shutterstock.com

Although many people just understand “love bombing” or “intermittent reinforcement” It can also occur in platonic and parental relationships in the context of a romantic relationship.

Narcissistic adult children may give their parents gifts, spend a lot of time with them, and pretend to support them with conversations, advice, or even forced empathy, but these are just their conditioning tools.

They want you to feel busy and, more importantly, indebted to them at every turn, so they will use “love bombing” to gain your favor. This reinforcement cycle is not only manipulative in any relationship; According to psychology, this is one of the telltale signs that your adult child is a narcissist.

9. They rely on you for validation and trust building

Narcissistic adult man sitting at laptop with his mother. Fizkes | shutterstock.com

by the book Psychological Perspectives on PraiseSome adult children inherit narcissistic tendencies from being “over-praised” by their parents while growing up. This cycle of behavior and reinforcement often continues into adulthood, although this is rarely the only reason they become narcissistic.

Narcissistic adult children will continue to look to their parents for approval and attention, especially when they cannot get it from others; From intense career praise to superficial compliments about their appearance, they will miss it.

10. They ruin special occasions and holidays

Narcissistic woman looks sad next to her mother. ViDI Studio | shutterstock.com

With a self-centered, “it’s all about me” attitude, narcissistic adult children hate sharing the spotlight with other people, events, and holidays. They often sabotage meetings that are not entirely about them.

Whether it’s engaging in attention-seeking activities, talking to attendees on their own, or just generally causing chaos, they don’t hesitate to adjust the course of events in favor of their own need for validation. But don’t call them for it, ’cause ScienceDirect studies This suggestion is because most narcissists become more agitated when asked to feel embarrassed in group settings.

Zayda Slabbekoorn is a News and Entertainment Writer at YourTango, focusing on health and wellness, social policy and human interest stories.