Nickelback and Kid Rock’s Co-Headline Tour Will Be the Biggest Gathering of Divorced Dads Ever

In a move that probably isn’t all that surprising in 2024, two powerful acts aimed at disaffected white men looking to take a victory lap in the wake of Donald Trump’s election victory have joined forces to let middle-aged divorcees do just that. That’s right – country rap hustler Robert James Ritchie (aka Kid Rock) and Canadian hard rock band Nickelback will share the bill at the top of the traveling festival called ‘Rock The Country’.

Described by the festival’s organizers as “a movement of hard-working, God-fearing patriots who love America and believe in the power of live music to bring people together,” this shit is sure to be full of dudes paying alimony. and midlife crisis were walking around with their cell phones. Of course, their kids are embarrassed, but at least they can have two nights where “the beer flows, the love flows, and the music pours down like a monsoon.”

But that’s not all. A traveling Budweiser drinkers’ convention turned rock and country festival; unsurprisingly, Aaron Lewis And The Stateliners, Big & Rich, Hank Williams Jr., just to name a few. and Lynyrd Skynyrd will be featured. Actually, the whole lineup is as follows:

The festival will also feature a “Throwback Happy Hour” featuring Diamond Rio, Shenandoah, Mark Chesnutt, Lee Greenwood, Sammy Kershaw, Neal McCoy and Deana Carter. Perhaps the biggest departure from the rest of the bill will be some “House Party sets” by Afroman, Ying Yang Twins, Rehab and Dee Jay Silver.

If any of this sounds like a good time, or if you’re about to finalize a divorce before the tour starts next April, you might want to check out the latest list below.

Rock the Country Tour

04/04-05 Livingston, LA – Livingston Fairgrounds
04/25-26 Knoxville, TN – Greenback’s Maple Lane Farms
05/02-03 Poplar Bluff, MO – Brick’s Off Road Park
05/09-10 Ocala, FL – Florida Horse Park
05/30-31 York, PA – York Expo Center
06/13-14 Hastings, MI – Barry Expo Center
06/19-21 Cullman, AL – (South Rock) York Farms
06/20-21 Little Rock, AR – Arkansas State Fairgrounds
07/11-12 Ashland, KY – Boyd County Fairgrounds
07/18-19 Sioux Falls, SD – WH Lyon Fairgrounds
07/25-26 Anderson, SC – Anderson Sports and Entertainment Center