Networking Reframed

The U.S. Naval Academy and the Pell Center at Salve Regina University, both in Newport, Rhode Island, recently hosted the Newport Forum, a conference on Geostrategic and National Security Challenges and Opportunities Posed by Climate Change. It was a great conference with many speakers including former Secretary of State John Kerry. One of the first speakers was Rear Admiral Darryl L. Walker, the newly appointed President of the Military Academy. He started his speech by saying, “The three most important ships in the Navy are friendship, partnership and relationship.” For years, I have shared with audiences of partners and associates at law firms, accounting firms, and consulting firms that, no matter what industry, we are all fundamentally in the relationship business. I didn’t realize until Rear Admiral Walker spoke that the gist of that statement applied equally to the military. It seems that success in any profession requires building a strong network of relationships.

Some professionals, especially “knowledge workers” (law, consulting, technology), find the idea of ​​networking distasteful, as if they were being asked to sell their intellectual product. Others think of networking as approaching other people with the obvious ulterior motive of selling something, as if the essence of networking is transactional and manipulative. I encourage you to think about networking from a different perspective. Ask yourself two simple questions.

1. Does the service I offer add value?

2. Are there people who would benefit from appointing me for this service?

If you answered “yes” to both of these questions, how can you not dare to find people who need your services? Keeping your talents bottled up is selfish, and not meeting people who need what you have to offer is self-limiting.

Although these events serve their purpose for some industries and are perfect for practicing your elevator pitch, at its core, networking isn’t about pleasing people at awkward, structured networking events. Networking is about building stronger, more durable and deeper relationships with people you are already connected with. If you’re interested in a more subtle and effective version of networking for senior service work, here are some suggestions.

Positioning Yourself

When asked what they do for a living, most people answer with their job title. “I am a partner at Smith & Jones” or “I am the Senior Manager of Data Governance and Security at Acme Bank.” So most people answer the question by sharing what status they have achieved, not what they have done. Telling someone your title rarely says anything about what you really are To do. Instead, answer this question with: “I help.” (WHO) finalize (What) .” For example, instead of saying, “I’m a real estate partner at the law firm Garcia & Sutherland,” say, “I help developers close their deals.” By using the verb “help,” you frame who you are in terms of the value you add rather than the status you achieve. This is inherently more appealing to other people and more likely to stimulate a conversation. It also changes your perspective on who you are and why you should network.

Showing Interest in Others

Networks involve relationships that function only when value flows in two directions. To be successful in building your business through networking, you need to have a genuine interest in helping others. Sometimes this assistance includes providing the comprehensive consulting, financial, legal or technical service you offer. Other times, the value you have to offer is in the network you develop.

When someone in your network needs a service that you don’t provide, you’ll increase your value if you can connect your person with someone in your network who can help them. Instead of thinking about how you can get more value from your network, be open to different types of value you can provide. This means actively asking “How can I help all the people in my network?” It doesn’t mean you should think. It just means that when someone shares a need, think beyond yourself to the people you know as you try to determine how you can be a resource to others. Professionals who are shy about making connections for others are rarely successful at networking because their value to those in their network is limited. As you expand your networking efforts, think about everything you can offer your connections rather than everything you hope to gain from them.

Make it easy for people to remember you.

We are all busy and we are all preoccupied with our own issues and needs. This isn’t bad or wrong; it’s just the human condition, especially if you’re trying to improve your business. Networking effectively means making it easy for people to remember you. This requires you to put more of yourself out there. You don’t need to attend a lot of conferences or go to specific networking events. Instead, network by reaching out more often to people you already know. Make a list of all the people you have served in the last three years. (If you work at a large firm, ask your accounting department to send you a list of billable matters from the last few years.) You probably worked very closely with a major client a few years ago and have developed some knowledge. Establish good relationships with your contacts there. When the agreement was completed, you got busy with the next issue and broke off the relationship. Send these people a quick email saying:

I hope everything is okay. We haven’t talked since (look at the project you’re working on). Your company name came up recently and I thought I’d send a quick note to see how you’re doing. I welcome the opportunity to connect and catch up. Let me know if you’re available to call in the coming weeks.

If you send a dozen similar emails, you’ll probably only hear back from two or three people. No problem The purpose of emails is to remind people that you exist. You put yourself first in their eyes. Even if they don’t respond, you’ll jog their memory about how great it was to work with you and the value you add. If they have a need you can help with, you’ve made them more likely to call you rather than one of the other consultants they work with.

Summary

These three steps build on each other. If you start by reframing how you define yourself, you’ll become more conscious of the value you place on others and feel less uncertain about approaching your connections and making new ones.

If you genuinely care about others, you will find ways to serve beyond just your own abilities. This makes you more valuable to other people.

Finally, reaching out to people you’ve lost touch with deepens the bonds you already have. Then you bring those relationships closer to friendships and partnerships, which are the most important vessels for navigating our careers.