8 Signs of Someone You Can Really Trust, According to Psychology

I encounter many people who are frustrated with the influence (and lack thereof) they have on other people. They want to grow their business, resonate, connect, sell things, and make an impact. But the one thing we might miss that is at the heart of this level of influence is trust.

We constantly communicate our intentions to the conscious and subconscious. And people make quick decisions based on our actions. Whether we can influence another person depends on trust. If they’re missing, they won’t stick around for long.

Here are eight signs of a person you can truly trust:

1. They keep their promises

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Many people overlook the importance of doing what you say you will do. Not only is this vital in instilling trust in others, but it also strengthens your self-identity as a responsible person you believe in.

This is why consistent people instill more confidence. Sometimes it may seem trivial to follow through on something you say that doesn’t mean much to you, but every little thing you do is felt and seen in the world in some way. When we consistently fail to follow up our words with actions, people slowly but surely begin to lose faith in us.

Research published by Frontiers in Psychology in 2023 It shows that keeping your promises significantly benefits your personal and professional relationships by building trust, enhancing your reputation, increasing your self-esteem, and promoting positive emotional well-being, as breaking promises can lead to feelings of guilt, shame, and damaged connections with others. Essentially, keeping your word is a very important factor in developing solid and trusting relationships.

2. They are not selfish

group of women in a team meeting Christina Morillo | pexels

This is the tendency of many in the modern age. Everyone is looking at their phonesThey worry about how they look, even if no one sees them. If you’re constantly thinking about how you come across, it reflects one thing: You’re not thinking about others.

When our life strategy is one-sided (an obsessive self-preservation strategy), others will sense it. Would you trust someone who can’t stop thinking about himself?

3. They are not easily triggered

calm professional man sitting on a chair Tima Miroshnichenko | pexels

If you are triggered by something or someone and react emotionally without thinking, this indicates that you are emotionally immature. We’re talking about the difference a few seconds make.

Learn to create the smallest amount of space in your head space so you don’t react unnecessarily. People lose trust in people who cannot control their emotions. Be careful here because this could damage your reputation.

Being relaxed and moving slowly can earn you respect by providing confidence, calmness and control. A. Study published by Frontiers in Psychology It shows that you are not easily flustered or under pressure, and that you can make thoughtful decisions even in stressful situations. This shows that you are “in the moment” and not rushing to react impulsively.

4. They tell the truth

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Sometimes, we lie to be polite in a social situation so as not to hurt others unnecessarily. This reflects the person’s social intelligence. However, most forms of lying, especially when discovered by the recipient, significantly damage the relationship and the person’s level of trust. Lying is a no-brainer on this list. This is why showing honesty is so refreshing.

How can they trust you again when we’re dishonest and they’ve learned that? Even if you tell the truth, people will have a hard time believing you from then on.

A 2020 study from the Journal of Legal Studies Education It suggests that consistently telling the truth fosters solid, trusting relationships, reduces stress and anxiety, improves mental health, increases personal integrity, and can even lead to a better reputation within a community, which can be generally beneficial in many social situations. However, there are subtle situations where a white lie may be considered appropriate, depending on context and intent.

5. They take good care of themselves

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Many of us ignore the need to look good on the outside. ‘Superficial!’ you say. So what does it mean if you can’t find the time to take care of yourself internally and externally? Do you have time to think about others?

The main characteristic of a good leader is to show genuine interest in those around him. This starts with showing one’s personal care down to the smallest aesthetic details.

If you have poor personal hygiene, I will trust you less. This also applies to your online aesthetic and style.

In Vagaro’s 2021 national surveyAmericans cited the benefits of self-care as increased self-confidence (64%), increased productivity (67%) and happiness (71%). From a physical health perspective, self-care reduces heart disease, stroke and cancer.

6. They are responsible for their words and actions

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If I earned a hundred dollars for every person who challenged me because of failed expectations, I’d be rich.

‘Jason told me his co-worker was driving him crazy and wasn’t pulling his weight in the office.’

Relationships almost always break down because we rely on our expectations rather than making firm agreements with people. In order to create a positive synergy, whether with a child, spouse or colleague, we must make agreements with them and ourselves.

This is what it means to be responsible. Expectations will rarely be met. But I mustered up the courage and said, ‘Can we agree to do this?’ When I say. We now communicate like adults and create a trusting environment.

Research published by the Journal of Economic Psychology suggests that lowering expectations can lead to greater satisfaction and less disappointment. When people are unsure of a desired outcome, they may try to protect themselves from the experience of disappointment by underestimating their chances of achieving that outcome.

7. They rarely make assumptions

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When we make assumptions, we act on incomplete information. We do this out of impatience and lack of emotional maturity (have you noticed a common bond forming?).

Basing decisions on assumptions has caused untold pain and disappointment to billions of people over time. To simplify, assuming everything is fine but taking action based on an assumption is risky and often reckless.

If we exit a t-intersection assuming there are no other cars, we risk a collision with limited information. When we live like this, our self-confidence secretly decreases and the trust of others in us disappears.

8. They take full responsibility for their mistakes

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Have you ever encountered someone who just can’t seem to take responsibility for anything they do? How trustworthy do they seem to you?

There is a direct connection between one’s tendency to place blame on externalities and the trust they instill in others. From where?

Because not taking responsibility for one’s wrong decisions always comes from an insecure place. People who lack self-confidence are often prone to making bad decisions, and many are quick to save themselves before others do.

Trust happens when we see that you are willing to look bad or have an uncomfortable conversation if it means getting to the truth. For example, if someone admits their past mistakes and we learn something that helps us, that is taking responsibility and being honest. This instills trust. Leaders who take risks and are willing to face criticism raise the most loyal followers.

Various studies and philosophical debates explore the concept of radical responsibility, particularly in fields such as ethics, leadership, and social psychology; It focuses on taking ownership of one’s actions and their impact beyond the immediate situation, and often involves examining systemic problems and personal complicity within them.

Philosophical investigations around “radical responsibility” often fall within the concept of “moral agency,” in which individuals are seen as having a greater responsibility to consider the broader consequences of their actions and choices, even when they are seemingly trivial. According to a 2021 analysis published by the Journal of Nursing Philosophy.

Let me give you another piece of advice about trust that has helped me for years and that I repeat often:

We are all interconnected, so let go of your self-obsession and help others get what they want; In return, they will want to support you. (You can’t just say you’re trustworthy; you have to prove it).

Alex Mathers is an author and coach who helps you build a personal brand that makes money with your knowledge and skills while remaining mentally tough.